21.06.02 | 8:38 pm
Justin
Today was a long, hard day.... Work was so busy, everyone is getting really run down from the long hours and the appauling amount of work due to the company's slack ass. The phones were non stop today and I've got a mile-high stack of paperwork which needs doing *mel groans*...
*think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts..*
Hey, at least it's Friday.
Justin came over last night - it was our 8 month anniversary *yay for us*. He took me to Pizza Hut. He told me he was taking me out for dinner and that it was a suprise.. So I'm thinking like Lakers Pub... Nicholson Rd Bar & Grill... Han's Cafe even. And we get there, he pulls into the carpark and I'm like... *looking for a restaurant*. Pizza Hut didn't even occur to me, I was like... ha as if. But then he looked at me and looked at Pizza Hut and I was like... *face fall*. I felt so bad because I knew how much Justin wanted to make me happy, but I couldn't hide it. It was devastatingly unromantic... I couldn't believe he took me to Pizza Hut for our anniversary.
Anyway, me being the careful person I am, fully let my feelings show. Justin got upset and we eventually took refuge in Han's Cafe. I felt/feel absolutely awful about it...
I would have gone into Pizza Hut, just to make Justin happy. And I spose pizza's not that bad... It's just I was wearing a black lace top, a knee length skirt, a denim jacket, black heels and I was carrying a little black handbag.
People were in there in their ugg-boots and trackpants for Christ's sake.
I sound like such a bitch *pulls a face*
I love Justin so much. And it breaks my heart when he tries so hard to make me happy and something just doesn't work out. I'm always happy when I'm with Justin, but he strives so hard to make everything *perfect*. And while it is the thought that counts, its hard to make things perfect because there are very, very few things in life which are perfect. I used to be a perfectionist... in some ways I still am. It's an easy thing to crave, but almost an impossible target. And it's a bitter thing to accept...
I love Justin. I love being with him. I love his body, I'm in love with that the most. It's so beautiful... It's not like a supermodel's body, and I know mine's not a model body either, but I just love his. I love the way my head fits on his pecs... it's the most wonderful and warmest feeling in the world. His shoulders and his back are so perfect, masculine enought to be a strong male, but petite enough to be beautiful body as well..
And his smell... did I mention his smell? I don't want pretty-boy-shower-gel-and-matching-cologne smelling guys... Bottle Justin's scent and I'd wear it everyday. It's that musky, warm fragrance of sebum, sweat and the soft, worn in fragrance of his CK or Tommy. I'm so in love with it... *sigh*.
Anyway... I should be off. I want to talk to my baby before I goto bed. He's at a party atm, a friend's 18th. I was sposed to go but it's raining and I'm so exhausted from the packed week I've had. I miss him so much though...
Write again soon guys,
Much love
Mel.