25.09.02 | 1:52 pm
judgments plus
Hey guys,
I was on Justin's MSN earlier... I only went on to see who was there, I wasn't going to cause trouble or anything, I mean, what could I do? Kelz was on... and I was like... *heart stop*. I didn't say a word though... honest to God. In fact I was quite interested to see if she'd say anything to "Jus". But she didn't and I was like hmph, boring. Kate and Claire were on as well and I was suprised that Claire didn't say anything to "Jus" about me and my diary... *shrug*.
There's this other thing that I was going to mention this morning that I forgot about at the time... I was talking to Justin yesterday while we were in the city and I realised I'm like a really judgemental person. Especially when it comes to image, how a person dresses, how they act, what makeup or jewellery they're wearing.... and I was like shit, I never thought of myself as a judgemental person. When I really look at a person, sometimes I think oh yeah, just because they're dressed funny doesn't mean they're not a nice person. Image is very important to me for some reason though... possibly because I'm insecure with my own image. I don't know though... I always thought I was fairly confident with the image I promote of myself. I'm pretty, I have good taste and fashion sense. I'm an artist for God's sake, and a perfectionist at that. Lol, dear me, how superficial did that sound. I used to especially judge girls that were around my age or slightly younger, that were dressed like skanks (big huge jumpers, white pants, gross little tiny tops, skate shoes etc), girls that just looked generally trashy, who were hanging around with a group of dodgy looking guys. And I used to think ick. But when I think about it... I used to be like that. When I was about 15. Me and my best friend Ell used to hang out with a group of guys aged between 17 and 24, whom we called the Armadale crew. During the holidays, we used to go out to a mates house and sit around drinking beer and smoking cones all night every night. We partied every weekend and it was just cool. And even though all the guys looked like dodgy bums, and we looked like skanks, we were all decent people inside. The guys were great, they looked out for us girls, they were there when we needed advice or a shoulder to cry on. They were our family for the better part of the summer holidays. And every person has their own family, even if it is a bunch of bogan looking alcoholics. As long as they're decent people, its okay.
It's habit I suppose. If I see someone who's dressed real trashy I think yuk she looks gross. I don't always think oh my god she must be such a loser as a person, real bitchy and rude. But with some people I do think oh god she must be a slut and a half or things like that. Bad habit I know =
Anyway, just thought I'd get that off my chest. Chat later guys,
Love Mel *mwah*